Having been caught up in a whirlwind of change over that last 18 months, I now found myself at the Riding for the Disabled Association National Championships sitting proudly upon Berry, a 20 year old horse, something I could never have imagined as being on my future agenda. I have confirmed Multiple Sclerosis, have experienced the transition to medical retirement, left behind a bad marriage and all by the age of 32. Yet here I was, waiting for my turn to enter the arena: happy and fulfilled for the first time in a very long time.

My allotted time was 2:30pm on the Saturday and having to drive to Gloucester for the event, decided to drive down the night before. Fatigue was not going to spoil this for me. I had never been a competitor in any field before but now I was in it, wouldn’t it be lovely to win it! It took longer than expected to get there, after about one and a half hours tears were rolling from my eyes as I repeatedly yawned. Driving took a lot out of me these days but I hadn’t wanted to travel with the horses for the day, I wanted to do some work for the RDA whilst I was there. At 8:30pm I had reached J13, dropped my bags around the room and made the bed. There was a plan for the Friday night and that was to watch a DVD on my laptop in bed with a ready mixed Port and lemonade; a godsend for anyone which aching limbs.

Saturday lunchtime arrived and I awoke naturally, feeling refreshed and ready to go. I changed into my specially purchased competition wear and headed for the arena. Within the hour I met up with other members of the Perry Group and began to get the horse ready. Now, here I was, riding Berry in the Horse/Pony & Rider Competition, a real character and a stunning looking horse. We had a chat whilst we were getting ready, I asked him to help me out and kissed him. I don’t suppose that he understood what I was saying to him but he looked at me with those big brown eyes and that was enough. We had walked towards to arena at an eager and yet relaxed pace. Berry was ready to ‘strut his stuff’ and I was a more than happy passenger.

The judges beckoned and off we went. The first three obstacles went well and then there was the gate. The dreaded gate, which was a gamble any day, would I align correctly or not? In the qualifiers this had taken two attempts but today we managed it first time. That was the part that worried me the most and yet the real hurdle was waiting ahead of me.

Berry turned the corner and instead of trotting the length of the arena, cantered which although a rewarding experience, was not permitted in the rules and could only go against us. Other Perry group members watched in suspense, would I fall, could I stop him? I’d only been riding on a regular basis for the past 7 months and yet here I was, at the Nationals and managing to keep control. We finished the course and greeted support from our group. It was excellent fun and we even received a rosette for participating, I love that about the RDA, nobody goes home without a rosette!

Changing my shirt and tie for a volunteer polo shirt, I went to my post to begin work. I was helping out in Liz’s Café, where a team kept the judges and other volunteers supplied with drinks. Now my sociable side was unleashed and I met an ever increasing group of wonderful people. These were able bodied and disabled people, working together to improve lives. I didn’t look until 5 O’clock at the results board, I didn’t really care, I was having such a good day but then I saw it - D Johnson 2^nd 'S'. The 'S' had to mean that I wasn’t actually second out of everyone in the competition, I couldn’t be, so I checked with a friend. A friend who was familiar with the horse world and a friend that pointed out that the 'S' stood for 'senior'. Stupid or disbelieving, I am not sure but it didn’t really sink in until I had to stand before a large marquee of people to receive my rosette. Everyone clapped and a camera was clicking in my face, stunned is an appropriate word and yet exhilarated. At last I had actually achieved something in the competitive world. So this was what it felt like!

The atmosphere was unique, there were people with a variety of disabilities everywhere I looked. Nobody stopped to stare, in fact quite the opposite, wheelchairs, sticks and disease could be easily spotted. A wonderful mood of acceptance and understanding underlay the entire event and despite any pain, everybody laughed and shared a little happiness. Later, at the annual disco, I saw a beautiful little girl dancing to one of the latest chart hits, with a large group of other children. They all wore smiles as they danced and giggled. Then I noticed her hair was patchy and discoloured, she was sick! I watched her having the time of her life on that dance floor, fighting for the right to be alive in the face of her affliction. My eyes filled up and my heart was engulfed by awe and admiration. That’s the other wonderful thing about this weekend; no-one arrived with any pity, admiration was the force at work behind the scenes. The opportunity for those with a disability to shine was seized by all and Hartpury College was filled with hundreds of winners!

On the Sunday it rained but the spirit didn’t dampen. More and more competitors arrived and the crowds continued to cheer. The good old British Spirit was frequently referred to and cups of tea were flowing. Dripping volunteers, wet to the skin came into Liz’s café for tea and coffee and for the first time ever I didn’t witness anybody not giving 100%. Hidden away from this utopia, back in the real world, more violence and killing continued and I came home to the news of it all. For a weekend though, for a weekend I was unaware and face to face with the very best of human nature.